If I turned off the sun, you're still gonna shine

For the last couple of months, its almost becoming a monday routine that I have to visit NAB bank, which slowly comes to me as one of the worst banks in the world

The story being......
I took a bank cheque out in late January to pay for camp ground fee
I sent it in the mail but never got the receipt or a reply back
I called the camp ground and they said they havent got it so I paid with credit card
I returned to cancel the cheque but the bank told me it had already been cashed out
Called the camp ground but they denied of ever having recieved it
so Im trying to get the bank to track the cheque so I have some evidence to get refunded from the camp ground ppl (cos they prob cashed it without knowing it was from me)

Looking at the date today, u prob realise how long Ive been following this thing up for
I dun have much free time so I can only go on mondays (every monday in fact)
Parkville campus is always busy so I went to the carlton branch
What really annoys the hell out of me is that carlton branch said I took the cheque out at parkville so I have to go talk to them and the parkville branch said they couldnt access any info cos I launched an enquiry at carlton branch....
lousy...theyll hav no business working in asian countries like this
Imagine me going in every week and had to explain what I just said every time to different consultants
They were so slow I had time to fold 3 origamis
They were so slow I literally felt asleep on the serving counter (the guy next to me nudged to wake me)
Took them til last week to give me an enquiry number, let alone even looking into this enquiry at all...
10 mins to get there. 10 mins to get back.
Stuck there for 30-60 mins. Thats 1 hr+ of my hard-to-find lunch time every week
I'm tired beyond tired that I learn not to get upset when I'm going into the bank anymore

Anyway, this isnt what I was trying to say
Today, being bored by the wait like usual, I noticed the consultant calling for the next customer in line,
"How may I help u?"
An asian guy walked up and did his business with a confused face
After a while the guy bursted out laughing
From my understanding, the asian guy misheard what the consultant said for "let the fat one through"
He made a remark "call me fat or skinny all u like. As long as I have my money, I'm happy"

Moral of the story: If u concentrate on whats making u upset, ull miss all the good things that come by

PS. The title has nothing to do with what I said. I just like it cos someone tried to pick me up with that line today :-D

A mix-and-match day

Diary: Friday 18 April 08

-Saw 3 Pros patients in the morning
The 1st pt went well with the try-in despite me forgeting to take the tooth shade
The 2nd pt: happy with myself on border moulding given I've only done it once (shockingly) last yr
The 3rd pt: I finally have a denture relining case
The demonstrator ran off b4 signing my 3 records

-Pour-up 2nd pt's casts
Had some lunch and a good cup of coffee

-Sealing 1st pt work for processing
Broke 3 out of 6 six teeth upon removing the 2nd pt cast
Once again, my primary impressions turned out better than my secondary
Broadened my perspective through a casual afternoon chat with Ewing while making wax rim
Of course, getting a couple of tips on relining dentures in the process
Talked too much...didnt get the rim done
The lab was close so I couldn't mount endo teeth
Forgot to go to the bank

-Was gonna go home but I couldnt be bothered fletching my 3 files from the record department again (it'll take hrs) so...
Waited 1 hr for Dr Saleh to sign my records...g*y

-Endo pt cancelled on me for next week

-Went home and watched 2 movies

With so much going for me, I still think it was an underachieving day
Maybe I expected too much
Just 2 days ago, Dr Lindner kindly reminded me that I "should learn to work with contentment"
I dun think she was the first to tell me that

Lousy test

Yes I admit it...I got sucked into doing one of those stupid online tests
"Which dental specialty suits you best?"
Tell me that wasn't appealing...
and even though the test result shouldn't govern my life or how I think, I took the test anyway

After answering...
yes I fall asleep in class
I think implant should belong to oral surgeon
I prefer PA
I expect to pick up an articulator once in a while in practice after grad
Im ok with kids
Im ok with the sight of blood

It told me that I'm the periodontist-to-be
u know how these sort of tests are designed to work truism on ppl
ie telling what ppl already know themselves deep down
so ppl can go "oh wow the test really works...its so awesome"
but guess what
Before taking the test, my mind was telling me I was willing to do just about any specialty other than perio

I'm so not specialising in perio
useless...

PS. I bet its someone's scheme to recruit more periodontist since its such an unpopular specialty

Damned

Buddhism believes in karma and reincarnation. All creatures are reborn into the world in diffrent shapes and forms to build up good karma and be rid of their bad ones. Only when we are purified would we be able to leave this reincarnating cycle and go to heaven

Traditionally, male buddhists at the age of 20 have the 'duty' to reside in the monsatery for a certain period of time in which they meditate, collect themselves and if possible, try to find their path to leave the life and death cycle
It is believed that the good karma created would allow their parents (especially the mum cos she cant be a monk) to reach heaven in the after-life

Sadly its prob one of the few men's duties (others being national service) I wont be able to accomplish in life

Why aren't we all going to heaven? why are we still here in this cycle of birth, age, sickness and death?
Cos we r all still merge ourselves in temptations, which lead us down the path of unholiness
They come in 4 simple forms...Love, Greed, Anger and obsession

I never thought I could do my mum justice (being the nice mum she is) and seek the paeceful path cos I'm too deep in this pool of temptation to purify myself
Like a perfectly normal human, I hav them all but I dun control them very well
When I love, I let it affects my emotion, my life, my decisions, my actions, my better self
Greed makes me selfish. Most of the time I put my interest first. More I want, less I give. Havent u noticed that Im such a bad gambler...plenty of greed no luck
Anger is one of my worst weakness. I get frustrated, stressed and angry easily. I dun channel it very well either. I take 'pointless' vengeance and retaliate. Often ppl around me suffer from it and I'm grateful that they are still sticking by me
Obssesive I am. Keep telling myself to do things in moderation but I dun. With a total lack of self control I follow my passion/emotion too much and like the wind, it keeps changing directions.

Me being the monk would only disgrace the religion
If we can escape this karma cycle so easily then there wouldnt be so much grief and sadness in the world
I'm so sori to my mum...whatever goods I did in my previous life had brought me here to be her son...
and I can only hope that the good things I did the in past, now and may have done for the rest of my life would let me be born as my mum's son again next life

Let me whine and go to sleep

Skip this blog...I'm just whining

Today is so g*y
Pt turned up almost an hour late when I turned up half an hr early (this happened two weeks in the row now)
Pt complained about traffic (I couldn't care less)
Couldn't get salivary test kit off Dr Stacey
Pt whined some more about not wanting LA ("I feel sleepy afterwards" what sort of excuse is that?)
BecBec took my usual working bay (I know I'm a baby but that bay has a sentimental value to me)
The bay I worked in sux
Handpiece leaked water
Triplex wouldnt stop dripping
Slow speed suction didnt work
Pt complained some more about not wanting to swallow her own saliva (we do that naturally every 30 sec)
Cutting burs were blunt. couldn't drill amalgam
The cavity was hugh and deep
The bleeding wouldn't stop
Pt complained some more about haemodent taste
(My rule: U dun complain when u turn up late)
Couldn't put the matrix band in deep enough
Dr N... Talked too much again
The nurse wouldn't listen to me and stuffed up my filling for me
Didn't get to do anything else apart from that filling today
Finished late by half an hour (If she wasnt late I wouldve been on time)
Dr N. ran off before signing my file
Got to lec 40mins late...couldn't understand what Dr Darby was talking about anyway
Felt sh*t... even lunch tasted crap
Waxing wasn't as enjoyable as it used to be... didnt feel so prosnutty

On a side-note, a fren of mine, Mr. A asked me today for the third time in 4 days to play boardgames then changed his mind
Hes starting to sound like my pt who dun turn up when they said they would and thats what I hate the most after my long day in the clinics

now I can go to sleep...

The end justifies the means

Today I played a game (a nice and neat game by the way) and something happened which reminded me about myself in a lot of situations in life
I make careless mistakes...most of the times if not all the times
and it seems like something I cant fix
like...how do u stop ur arms from involuntarily twitching?

"The end justifies the means", my teacher once told me
which simply says that its doesn't matter what u did, its the result of ur action that is accountable and judged on
So does that make me a lousy/underachieving person? cos whatever good things I did... didnt produce results
cos my tiny mistakes undo all my good deeds

Its costly to learn from ur own mistake
"Its good to learn from ones' mistakes, its far cheaper to learn from others' "...dunno who said that
While I have to keep making mistakes and learn from them...over and over...everytimes I face something new,
some other ppl can just do things naturally without making mistakes
What is it that they have? Are they just gifted or blessed?

Its not like I was unprepared
U can only preapared urself so much but in the end, its all about how well u execute what uve prepared and this is when silly mistakes come into play
Its something unplanned ...like a hidden trait in my genes that forces me to do something stupid when I least need it
and that little mistake robbed me off my victory

Its sad...and tiring too...u know

April Fools

I wonder sometimes who started up this annual lying/pranking day
Why do we have to make up a day to which lying is justified?
Does it make ppl wanna lie less on the other days?
I wouldn't know cos I lie all the times...(nothing to be proud of)
and it strikes me how true Mark Twain's quote is for me
"April 1st: This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three-hundred and sixty-four." — Mark Twain
That means I'm a lying b*st*rd

Of course, like every other yr, I do try to get into the spirit of the day and lie (more) anyway
I lied to this girl...this innocent little girl
Lying to her was much harder every times she answered back in her cheerful tone of voice, with hope and optimism
Til I couldnt do it anymore

So sori I lied...lied bout everything today
I didnt lose ur card... how can I lose such a precious thing u made for me
Yes, I do have a nice wall to put up ur beautiful card
and no... Im not an optimist like u

I'm such a fool

PS. Just dream on... not giving any of ur cards back